Pointless, Random Facts About Me

imageI was in the process of updating my ‘About’ page and after I had changed my age and a little of the wording I was stumped. While blogging is often a very narcissistic venture for me, I found a that when faced with an open opportunity to write whatever I wanted about myself, my brain suddenly shrivelled up and went to the pub.

In an effort to generate ideas I started to compile a list of potential things, and very soon I found that the silly side of me took over, leaving me with a mish-mash of random facts and thoughts of what makes me, well… Me! I thought that I would share them with you. Either that of post a picture of a cat.

imageI’m a music teacher, but I’ve always had a desire to be a dancer. Or more precisely, a street dancer. Unfortunately, my dance moves closely resemble that of a metaphorical frog-in-blender. Arms and legs everywhere. There has been much laughter and evidence in the many unfortunate photographs that have been posted on Facebook. However, I do know all the steps to Beyonce’s ‘Single Ladies.’ Oh, and the Macarena. Somehow, I don’t think that Beyonce’s backing dancers are shitting themselves about the competition…

I have a fabulous way of stopping people from repeatedly showing me the same pictures of their kids: I show them a picture of one of my cats. Please don’t think that I’m a heartless person – I’m delighted for them that they have been blessed with a child, but I don’t need to see pictures of little Billy with snot running down his face, little Billy using the potty for the first time or little Billy in the bath. I guarantee that I have far more pictures of Wobbly (my 19 year old tortie) than any parent have of their newborn. Works a treat.

I don’t own an iron. I hate the process and as a teenager watched my mother waste entire weekends because of it, so I simply refuse to do it. If an item of clothing needs ironing I hang it up as it is drying. I generally dress like a teenage boy anyway – I’m not out to impress.

1b3acc686f3b4641d8b8I’ve had a 25 year crush on the actor Dolph Lundgren. It began when watching Masters of the Universe at the age of 6, and even now I still think that he’s the most beautiful man ever created.

I’ve never watched Back To the Future. The Bloke almost died of shock when I informed him of this. However, I have seen Howard the Duck. On reflection I think I may have possibly made a few questionable choices over the years in my film-watching decisions.

I seem to lose the ability to articulate myself properly when articulation is needed most. A classic example of this is during an argument with an ex-housemate years ago. He had become involved in drugs and invited his dealer around to the house, which I had an issue with. I had been winning the argument, up until the point where I yelled, “Where do you think we are, the GECKO or something?” Not my finest hour.

I’ve never eaten a S’more. I didn’t even know what a S’more was until about a year ago.

Most women eventually turn into their mothers. I may as well be my mother’s twin… At 32. She’s in her mid 50’s and looks fabulous for her age, to the point where last time we went for a drink together she was asked for I.D. and I wasn’t. Nice.

This is generally how I like to problem solve:

imageIf I was ever lucky enough to win the lottery, I would buy a large plot of land and start a no-kill animal shelter. I would spend the day paying other people to clean up the poo while I got the cuddles.

I have had a ridiculous, irrational fear of something as long as I can remember, to the point where even simple pictures of these will send me into a blind panic and I cannot enter a room until said picture is removed.

What about you? Tell me one interesting fact about yourself!

You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @Suzie81blog – I’d love to see you there!

79 thoughts on “Pointless, Random Facts About Me

  1. That was great!!! you know my husband couldn’t believe that I had never seen Fast Times at Ridgemont High and he finally put it on last night……….I wasted an hour and a half of my life.

  2. Curses! My comment vanished before I was done with it. Just wanted to say thanks for the funny post. And also wanted to say that my favorite instructor in grade school was my music teacher.

  3. I’ve never eaten a S’more either and to be frank, don’t think I know what they are πŸ™‚ I’ve fallen asleep through ‘Top Gun’ twice and have never managed to sit through ‘Dirty Dancing’. But I do like ironing!!

  4. I may have to fight you over Dolph, he is my future ex-husband. πŸ˜‰

    OK, not interesting, but random: I am a huge dork who loves Star Wars and Star Trek, but I haven’t seen even one of the Lord of the Rings movies.

  5. I am typing with my right hand only because my 70 pound rescue mutt thinks she’s a lap dog and has my left arm pinned uselessly to the arm of my chair. I am getting way too proficient in typing this way instead of shooing her off. Even the bend and stretch capital letters.

    I’ve never seen any of the Star Wars movies and only the Shatner-Nimoy Star Trek movies.

  6. Omg now I want to know what you have an irrational fear of. Intentionally left out due to fear? Also, you need to eat a Smores and watch Back to the Future, preferably at the same time. Your life would be bettered.

  7. I own an iron, but never use it for anything other than the occasional crafting purpose. I also don’t use a hair dryer (we do own one, but I couldn’t even tell you where it is). Oh, we don’t have a toaster or a blender either….we’re like savages! πŸ˜‰ Great post!

  8. Ooh, I’m definitely stealing that cat picture idea! (note to self – find a cat to take pictures of) Also, wait until you see Dolph do the “old man snore” in Expendables 2 πŸ˜‰

    Random fact: the fastest way to put me to sleep is to hand me a cup of coffee… zzzz….

  9. Don’t worry about the irrational fear, Suzie. I have one too. A certain category of creepy crawly has sent me running up through the house yelling “DADDY! HELP!” for as long as I can remember. Nowadays, I run and hide behind my husband instead. He thinks its the funniest thing in the world, since I do a terribly embarrassing dance move right along with it.

  10. It’s high time you try a s’more. It’s graham cracker and melted marshmallow/chocolate goodness. It’s a great summer time treat to whip up around the fire pit. Or over your barbeque if you’re really craving some in the winter.

  11. Don’t feel too bad about not tasting a s’more until so recently. I still never have. I don’t even know where I would get one. Any suggestions?

    • It’s melted marshmallow and chocolate sandwiched between two Graham crackers… You’d probably have to buy the ingredients separately? They don’t eat them here in England.

  12. It’s great that you decided to do a post all about yourself πŸ™‚ I can relate to some of it; I also do not own an iron, dress like a teenage boy, would love to use my riches to help out animal rescues and get sick of people showing me their children’s pictures over and over again. We’re also about the same age – I’m 31. As for an interesting fact about me – I was abused as a child.

      • I actually tell the story a lot, but my blog is about cats so it really doesn’t make any sense to put it on there. I like to encourage people to get away from abuse and let them know that you can be “normal” again. The only time I really find it difficult to talk about is when I think that the other people involved in my story may be in my audience. No matter what happened, I still love them very much and I’ve forgiven them.

      • Thank you very much. Holding onto to things that other people have done to hurt you is like holding the end of a burning rope. They’ve already let go – it is you that will burn if you don’t let go too. If you ever want to hear my story, just let me know, I’m easy to find.

  13. I LOVE the way you problem solve – great solution to anything! As for ironing – some people call them hangers.
    Trying to think of something equally wonderfully silly and profound about me. Nothing much comes to mind. But thank you for this wonderful post, read just before I’m heading off to bed, laughing myself to sleep.

  14. What? You’ve never seen Back to the Future? I’ve lost count how many times I’ve seen it, though not for over 10 years I’m sure. I also look like my mother, as does my sister – one time when we were all out together we were mistaken for 3 sisters. Fun fact: I wear 3 types of contact lenses every day.

  15. I had a bloody good snigger at your Problem Solving Chart and also the mention of Masters of the Universe…If you haven’t already enjoyed it, I would recommend Dolph’s hilarious mincing run in Showdown in little Tokyo.

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  18. I love this post, made me laugh a lot. My random fact would have to be that I have 3 nipples…it’s an officially recognised medical condition. My brother has 4….we really were blessed with them in our family πŸ™‚

  19. Only one random fact? That might be hard as I have a veritable treasure trove of useless and marginally interesting facts that I COULD share. πŸ˜‰ Hmm… I guess I’ll go with, “I released a hip hop album when I was 16 and toured up and down Southern California my senior year.”

  20. I turn all the pictures of people around to face the wall. If it’s my house, they’re not up anyway, if it’s someone else’s house I’m staying at, I sometimes forget to turn them back around before I leave, so I’ve been asked why I do this. Honest answer? I have an irrational fear that people can watch you through their images. Freud would have a heyday with me.

  21. Wonderful facts- minus Dolph… I have to say, I just don’t get it. He’s all yours πŸ˜‰

    So you asked us to tell you one thing about yourself and I couldn’t think of a single thing. And then I pitied myself- I’ll have to think about this one.

  22. Great post. I love some peoples ability to write in such a funny and engaging manner, I unfortunately don’t have that ability. Totally agree with you about the ironing thing, just a total waste of time. My random fact is that if my mum hadn’t almost lost me at 20 weeks, I would not be here now.

  23. I cannot microwave anything! It terrifies me. I always feel like it’s about to explode ha ha. And that popping sound it makes when people are warming certain foods like sausages or popping popcorn, I cannot stand it. Plus I’m super paranoid about radiation, so yeah I warm all my food on the stove and always try to carry cold sandwiches or salads to work.

  24. Thanks for the laugh. I was going to say that I’m afraid of clowns, but that’s a fairly common fear. Ditto to not writing for 3 months/finishing the novel in progress due to fear of failure/success.

    Oh! here’s one!

    I wanted to be a teacher, but decided against it since I don’t really like children – so I became a mother instead.

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