Despite having the general fashion sense of a teenage boy, I’ve recently developed a minor obsession with makeup. I’ve always worn it, and have an extensive collection of high street products, but my general makeup routine evolves around the basics. On rare occasions I’ll go all out for a night out, but it isn’t something I’ve ever really been concerned with. I totally blame N – she’s got an amazing sense of style and has talked about her favourite vloggers on numerous occasions, so a little while ago I decided to check out a post or two on YouTube.
Four hours later, I had watched about twenty different videos and completely run down the battery on my phone. I had learned about contouring, highlighting, eyebrows, blending brushes… It was an enlightening experience, and I had to resist the urge to rush out and spend all my savings on the latest Urban Decay palettes (ooh, get me… palettes!). I did, however, remember a few Amazon vouchers that I hadn’t spent since receiving them last Christmas, so I had an enjoyable afternoon buying products that I never knew I wanted.
As is everything with my life at the minute, The Bloke has had to hear all about it, and has responded to my various makeup attempts with ‘erm… yeah, looks good’ whenever he’s returned from work. However, after watching one particular video from my favourite vlogger, Carli Bybel, in which her boyfriend did her makeup for her, I had a silly idea. I text him while he was at work:
Me: I’ve had an idea for a blog post. What about you have a go at doing my makeup?
Him: What, as in I put makeup on you?
Me: Yeah… Thought it would be fun.
Him: Yeah, go on then, I’m game for that.
I was surprised – I didn’t expect him to agree to it. He’s not exactly a beer drinking, football watching blokey bloke by any means, but he’s well over 6 feet tall, built like a swimmer, has no inclination to wear makeup whatsoever and after a long day it was probably not on his list of priorities. However, I set everything up for when he got back – I gave him a selection of products and brushes and told him that he had to create a look for a night out. I also put on an old shirt, just in case he dropped half of it over me…
I decided to take photographs instead of setting up a video (with us both working in schools it’s not a good idea to have video footage that the kids could find), but with that came the difficulty of having to take pics without looking, so I relied on him to line the camera up.
The look on his face was hilarious… He had no clue what any of it was for and spent about fifteen minutes just opening stuff and reading labels. I eventually asked him if he was going to get started, and he responded with:
“You like your shiny stuff don’t you?!”
He started with the eyeshadow, picking a really dark brown colour.
“Ah, that didn’t quite turn out how I expected.” He then proceeded to put tons of white over the top, and then settled for a bright pink blusher as it was the only ‘colour’ he could find. I couldn’t stop laughing, particularly as he had got fed up with the eyeshadow brush as it ‘didn’t work’ and had put it behind his ear like a carpenter would with a pencil and used a blending brush instead.
Eventually, after about 45 minutes, he got bored and moved onto the eyeliner. Not realising what the liquid liner was, he picked up a pencil and set to work.
He then attempted to put on the mascara, placing most of it on the top of my lashes and accidentally stabbing me in the eye on several occasions.
Eventually he attempted to put some powder on, told me to make a ‘fish face,’… and then proceeded to do my nose. Hmm… As I was taking pictures and wasn’t allowed to look at the camera, I didn’t quite realise what he was getting up to – I wet myself when I saw this:
Eventually, he moved onto the lipstick, and I was impressed with the shade that he picked.
An hour later, and he was finished…
To be fair, it wasn’t half as bad as I expected, but I couldn’t understand where any of the makeup actually was considering the amount of products that he had put on.
I suppose he was going for the natural look.
What about you guys? Ever had your partner put makeup on for you? There’s a project for the weekend!!
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