After the last few weeks I have been left feeling, quite honestly, hugely depressed. I would normally consider myself to be quite a strong person – I’ve had tougher times than this in the last and have managed to support myself through it, but after the recent news about the house I crumbled a little, threw myself an enormous pity party and have spent the last few days wallowing. I’m still weak from the hospitalisation that I had two weeks ago and the doctor has given me a note for the rest of this week, so I have been grateful to have the time to attempt to process everything. I’ve questioned my karma lots over the last few days – why me? I’m a good person, I work hard… Why do I have to constantly feel I have to battle with everyone?
However, while I don’t feel that there is anything wrong with occasionally focusing on the negative, there were several things yesterday that slapped me in the face and told me to get over myself.
Before I continue, I’d like to remind you again about a fellow WordPress blogger’s struggles with fibromyalgia and the fact that she is at the point of losing her home. I was hugely inspired by this post, which links to a donation site to help her out. I hadn’t met Merbear until yesterday, but I was inspired by her story and the outpouring of love and support that she received from the amazing blogging community, and I implore you to check out this post, reblog and get her story out there.
So, after the metaphorical face slapping I gave myself I woke up today and decided to simply move on. I know I have to move out, we’re lucky to have found somewhere new in such a short space of time that suits our needs, and the quicker I get my arse into gear the more organised and less stressed I will be about the situation. I can’t do a large amount of packing in one go, but I can do a little at a time and I’ll get there.
What about you guys? How do you deal with difficult times?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog
Within 48 hours of handing in our notice to our current landlord, a lettings board went up outside our house and we had five people booked in for viewings. Unfortunately, this also meant that the individual jobs that needed doing suddenly had to be completed in the space of a few hours in the evening as we were both at work during the day, but The Bloke and I worked hard and got it all done. We also had to take the cats to my friend’s house as we didn’t want them to get under everybody’s feet as they were walking around. This morning the house was let immediately (I was really pleased for my landlord because that means he doesn’t lose out on any money) and on top of everything else I’ve been able to sell a few bits of furniture that we didn’t want to take with us to one of the interested tenants…
The first week back at work has been better than I thought. I’ve met some of my classes, the new additions to my tutor group are adorable and I’ve only got a few hours of work to do over the weekend which isn’t as bad as I expected. This Monday is also my first official day of being part-time, which I’m expecting to feel both wonderful and strange. I think the next few weeks will consist mainly of packing and organising, but at least I won’t have to be doing it all whilst having to work full-time. Brilliant.
Upon reflection I think we have been extremely lucky with how well everything has gone so far. We’ve had so many positive messages and offers of help from friends and family and after feeling low for such a long period of time I finally feel that things are going our way. We’re very blessed.
Hope you guys are all doing well – I’ve still got paperwork to fill out this afternoon but I thoroughly intend on catching up with you all and replying to your lovely comments over the next few days…
Have any of you ever had an impending, persistent feeling of dread about something, only to find that the thing you were dreading was actually brilliant and you wished you hadn’t wasted all that time worrying about it?
This happened to me yesterday. I’d been dreading the return to work for a while and although I tried to keep myself busy I couldn’t shake the little anxious bubble that had seemed to manifest itself in the pit of my stomach. Getting out of bed yesterday was tough.
However, when I arrived I found that I was actually in quite a happy place – my colleagues are great and we all talked excitedly over each other about our holiday experiences, our exam results have improved massively since last year and so the data presentation given by our principal was positive and celebratory and we were provided a beautiful lunch as a thank you.
I love the idea that things happen in three’s, and yesterday afternoon was definitely proof of this. I was going through some assessment criteria with my boss and we were interrupted three times:
1. My faculty line manager walked in to show me an email that he’d received from a teacher at a primary school that I’ve been doing some workshops at. It was the nicest, most complimentary email I’ve ever had.
2. The ICT technician walked in to hand me a new iPad that the school had bought for me.
3. My faculty line manager’s boss walked in to tell me that as I’d come into work when it was technically my day off (I don’t work Monday’s) I could have Tuesday off instead.
What a brilliant day!
So here I am! I thought that I would take the opportunity to catch up with you all as I feel like I’ve barely looked at my blog. I’ve been delighted about the response that I had to my recent Blog Party so I’d like to thank all of you who submitted entries and reblogged various things – it was a brilliant opportunity to meet lots of new people and read some amazing stories! I’ve decided to make it a regular thing which will take place on the first day of each month. I also still have quite a few Guest Posts that I need to put up.
I’m off to catch up on all the posts that I’ve missed. If you are interested in following me on Twitter: @suzie81blog