It’s Father’s Day, and I’m expecting my social networking feeds to be filled with messages of love for fathers and father figures. While my own father is still alive, I haven’t seen or spoken to him in twelve years and I have absolutely no intention of having any contact in the future. This was a decision that I made at the age of nineteen and I have never regretted it. However, instead of writing a post about this, I started thinking about all the people in my life who are there and who offer continuous love and support in everything that I do – people who I often take for granted. Here are the things that we should take the time to say to somebody we care about today.
1. Thank you. It’s amazing how often that these little words are forgotten. Take the time to thank somebody who has gone that extra mile to support you.
2. The fact that you like having them in your life and that you enjoy spending time with them. It’s taken for granted that we spend time with the people (usually) who we enjoy being around and who makes us happy, but have you actually ever said this to them?
3. What you appreciate about them. My mother, The Bloke and my friends are funny, intelligent and talented people. They listen to me. When I’ve had a bad day, my friend V meets me in the pub, buys me a drink and let’s me rant. My best friend rings me several times a week so we can catch up, and we’ll meet at least once a week. M invites me round to her house for dinner. When I was in the hospital, C and M visited me. When my cat Wobbly died, G brought round cupcakes to my house. They buy me flowers, send me messages of support, make me laugh, entertain me and invite me out to places so we can spend time together.
4. That you find them attractive. This is something that would probably be best saying to your partner – I think my mother and friends would be slightly freaked out if I said this to them. However, a compliment on how they look and what they’re wearing would make somebody’s day.
5. My best memories involve you. The ‘do you remember when…?’ conversations are always good for strengthening a relationship. Reminiscing about hilarious past experiences never fails to remind us of why we have the friendship in the first place.
6. That you support them. They may already know this, but it wouldn’t hurt to let them know that you’re there.
7. That you love them. There are different kinds of love that are reserved for different people, but take the time to let them know (where possible – verbalising love for somebody may be taken in the wrong context in some situations).
What about you guys? What do you think is important to say to somebody that you care about?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog
Suzie Speaks 
Nice post. I think I might just do that today 🙂
Just support them in achieving whatever they wish to achieve in life. At times, actions speak louder than words, no?!
For us, just to realize our feelings is more than enough. And like Mr. Bhatia mentioned above, support us in our wishes.
Lovely post…
I am in the same situation as you. Thank you for this lovely list 🙂
Being there for the people who mean something to you is what I think it is all about. Being there to talk, to sit quietly, to listen, to take care of… whatever. Telling them too. I was also estranged from my father for 14 years-from the time I was 30 until 44- when I learned he was ill, and reconnected. In my case I made peace with the person he was, and was glad I did, he died 9 years ago. Great post.
I just started talking to my father again this year… It was tough, but the better decision for me in my life. It was my choice on my terms, maybe one day you will have that same feeling, let it come from you.
It’s a brave decision you made, but my father was violent and the last time I saw him I called the police, which is why there will never be a point where I would want to see him. However, I’m glad you are getting there!
Suzie, I’m so sorry to hear that. That is completely understandable and the reality is it’s your life. Blood is important, but it is definitely not everything. I just needed to make sure that I had accepted who my father was so that I could be ok- it wasn’t even about him. It was for my own mental health.
I think that’s a brilliant thing to do!
Just a look and a smile is enough. 🙂
You seem to have some nice friends. 🙂 Nice post.
Thank you!
What a sweet sentiment, Suzie. You’ve made a good point of telling people why they’re important to you.
I do tell my mom how pretty she is. She’s 86 and ill with Alzheimer’s, so she loves that I tell her how lovely she looks. She asks me, “Do you really think so?” and I tell her yes, emphatically. Her eyes sparkle at that, and even if the moment is only fleeting for her, that she smiles and is thrilled for that one little moment – a good thing. Compliments are not weird if they are sincere.
Enjoy the day, your Bloke, and your friends.
This is so lovely!
What a great way to turn it around. Thank you – I needed this today. There is altogether too much ‘Daddy love’ around the internet. It’s worse than the prolific football, when you’re not feeling it.
But focussing on others I love – that I can do 😀
yet for those of us who did indeed have a very nurturing dad (and not such a nurturing mom)whose dad is no longer alive, it just tugs a little at the inside of my heart. This is not a judgment it’s one of those situations where you just can’t understand because you are not them. If it makes you happy, wonderful !!!
Things to say? Thank you for staying with me throughout this crazy life.
I find it important to let your friends, loved ones, etc,. know that you are there for them just as they have been there for you. Offer a shoulder to cry on, or a girls night out for those that need it. Let them know that what they have done for you has not gone unnoticed, and that you would love to repay it to them, letting them know that you are just committed to the relationship as they are.
This is a nice post! It’s important to let close friends and family know that you truly appreciate them and glad that they are in your life…nothing is guaranteed, especially life.