Happy New Year!
The Bloke and I kept things very quiet, exactly how we wanted it. Snacky treats ready to go, the first of the Lord of the Rings trilogy (ready to do the next two today), the London fireworks on the TV, and no pressure to be anywhere or do anything more than that. It was low-key, comfortable, and a really nice way to see the year. Long gone are the days of fighting for breathing space in nightclubs, wearing eye-wateringly high-heels and spending a fortune on just a few drinks.
Over the last few years, I’ve added a Memories & Highlights double page spread to my Bullet Journal. It’s a simple way of capturing the positive moments from the past twelve months, and I’ve found it especially helpful when things feel heavy or overwhelming.
It’s not always easy to stay positive when the news and the cost of living are relentlessly bleak, and this year has been challenging in plenty of ways for most people, myself included. However, I think it matters to notice the good with gratitude, while also acknowledging the more difficult moments so you can move forward. 2025 hasn’t been perfect, but compared to recent years (like 2023, which was particularly brutal) it has actually been a year to look back on and being incredibly grateful for.
At the beginning of the year, I made a deliberate effort to take back control of my life. I had become aware that the pace I was keeping wasn’t sustainable, so I took some fairly extensive steps to create more balance and structure. I wanted to be more intentional with my time, to focus on what genuinely mattered rather than getting caught up in the constant state of being ‘busy.’
For the first few months, it worked well. I felt calmer, more focused, and was far better at managing my time and energy. But gradually, without really noticing, old habits began to creep back in. One small commitment led to another, and before long, that balance that I had worked so hard to create had started to slip away.
The last time I sat down to write a blog post was back in July. As I have done so many times before, I told myself that I would get back into the habit and post more often. Then, as life became more hectic, it all became a bit overwhelming.
The last week has been BRUTAL.
Not long ago, I was informed of a situation that would require me to be elsewhere for several weeks. This couldn’t have come at a worse time – I’m self-employed with nobody to cover me and it hit right at the start of prepping all the festive season posts for most of my social media clients. I wouldn’t be able to do much during the day and would physically be out of the house, so admin would have to be done extremely early in the morning, and then when I got home in the evening (as well as attempting to monitor a whole bunch of social media accounts if I had a few moments of free time during the day).
A week ago I met up with two friends, Sacha and Helen, in London. Both of them are authors – Sacha is absolutely killing it in the indie author world and Helen’s book has just been released across the UK with One More Chapter, part of Harper Collins publishing – but we actually met through blogging nearly ten years ago.
Yesterday morning – Saturday on the Easter Bank Holiday weekend – The Bloke and I were awake early. It was a rare day where both of us had the entire day to ourselves, so I suggested that we take advantage of the beautiful weather and go out somewhere.
The conversation about a day-trip to Solihull quickly turned into a trip to Worcester. We got ready and got on the bus…
… and ended up in London.
On Friday night I logged off and sank back into the couch. Last week wasn’t particularly bad, but it was certainly intense in the sheer volume of work that appeared on my daily lists. While everything got done I was left feeling mentally and physically exhausted.
Additionally, my sleep patterns have been all over the place (thank you, peri-menopause), and this has resulted in lots of my working hours being conducted through what has felt like a hazy fog behind my eyeballs recently.
Working for myself has a number of positives… in theory. I don’t have an awful daily commute, I can set my own hours, choose who I work with and I don’t have a micro-managing, passive-aggressive line manager to deal with (of which I have experienced many). While these are all things that I appreciate on a daily basis, I have found that as my client base has grown, an increasing level of fear has accompanied it…
Isn’t it strange how, when you find yourself in a difficult situation, the universe seemingly steps in and shows you the direction in which you need to go?
I discussed recently about the challenges that The Bloke and I have faced this year, particularly with the death of various family members and my mum being ill. We’re both tired and a bit stressed, we both struggle with depression and anxiety on occasion and both of us have found ourselves getting through the day on autopilot when things have got really tough.
On 1st January 2023 The Bloke and I sat on an enormous couch in a suite in a nice hotel. We were surrounded by our favourite snacks and were watching a film while talking about our hopes and expectations for the coming year.
“It’s going to be amazing, I can feel it,” I remember saying, and at the time, I believed it. After the world shut down in 2020 things had plummeted, and 2021 had been tough, so had 2022. Surely 2023 couldn’t get any worse, could it?
As it turns out, yes it could.
At the beginning of 2022 I set up a double page spread in my bullet journal titled ‘Memories and Highlights.’ This created a space where I could record all of the individual exciting things I experienced throughout the year and served as a reminder that this year hasn’t been as bad as I thought.
Because let’s face it, in terms of the year from a national perspective, it’s been a dumpster fire with a dose of accelerant thrown on top. Three prime ministers in a year, the worse economic position in decades, food, gas and electric prices skyrocketing to the point where people are having to choose between heating their house during the winter or feeding their children while utility companies boast about record profits, workers from our postal service, trains, nurses, paramedics have been forced to strike… and to top it all off our Queen died. So many of us are tired, worried and angry.
Suzie Speaks 
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