After reaching my heaviest ever weight last week, I decided that I was going to stop blaming the scales and do something about it. I’ve cut back on the rubbish that I have been eating, substituting it for healthier options (I discovered quinoa – there’s a sentence I never thought that I’d say) and this morning I decided to go for a run.
A few years ago, just before my 30th birthday, I bought myself a stunning designer dress in preparation for the party that I had organised. I had never spent that amount of money on an item of clothing before (or since – my diabetic cat and her vets bills have seen to that) but I decided to treat myself. The dress was just a little bit too tight for my liking and showed all the wrong lumps and bumps, but it gave me the ultimate motivation to lose the weight that I had been procrastinating about for months. I bought some decent running shoes and several times a week I ran up and down my local park with my best friend, puffing and spluttering my way through it in a manner that closely resembled Phoebe from Friends.
I hated every minute of it, but over time it got easier and I discovered that after just a few weeks I could do 5k with relative ease. My plan worked – I managed to lose just enough weight to feel comfortable in the dress and I thoroughly enjoyed wearing it.
Two years later, I’ve gradually slipped into old habits, and have not only put the weight back on, but I’ve added an extra 15lbs that snuck up on me and slapped me in the face when I stood on the scales recently. I’m pretty ashamed of myself. My dress now doesn’t even go past my hips, and this has prompted me to set a goal over the summer to change my lifestyle, lose the weight and wearing the dress again – it’s too beautiful to be just sitting in the wardrobe. So, this morning, I put on my running gear, set my Nike app, my 5K tracker and my playlist and did some warm up exercises. It was a glorious morning and the park next to my house was almost deserted.
Thirty minutes later, I arrived home. I had completed just 2km and burned 153 calories walking and running in timed intervals. Just like two years ago, I hated every single footstep – the only saving grace being the awesome playlist that I had set myself. My face appeared to have been replaced with a bright red, sweaty tomato with eyes, my legs were jelly, my chest was burning and I almost felt like I was going to be sick.
Gorgeous.
Still, everyone has to start somewhere! Here’s to a sweaty summer!
What about you? What’s your exercise of choice?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog.
I’ve been away from the blog for the longest period since I started it just over a year ago. There wasn’t anything that prompted this particular absence, it just sort of happened. I suppose the best explanation would be a mild case of blog burnout – I had run out of ideas, I was finding it difficult to keep up with the volume of comments that I was receiving (thank you – I read and appreciated every single one of them) and needed a little bit of time to regroup, so aside from a pug in some funny glasses and some reblogs my contribution to the blogging world has been minimal.
The last few weeks have reached a plateau of ‘just fine,’ which is a brilliant place to be after six months of continuous chaos. I slowed my pace down, relaxed a little and attempted to take things in my stride. I spent a lovely day in the sun, watching my students participate in the annual Sports Day, I enjoyed a fabulous meal at my favourite restaurant with The Bloke, I caught up with some old friends, rediscovered my love of Dolly Parton after watching her performance at Glastonbury on the TV, and I have developed an obsession with the TV show ‘White Collar’ and the ever lovely Matt Bomer (yes, I know he’s gay, happily married to his husband and a father of three, but he’s so pretty I could cry).
There was one thing I was determined to do, however, as soon as I got the chance:
Karaoke.
Yes. I’m one of those.
I can sing. I’m not exactly going to be winning the X Factor anytime soon, but I can hold a tune and make it sound ok. I first discovered this when then Best Mate and I started going to a karaoke bar in the Chinese Quarter in Birmingham just for something different, and after a few drinks I plucked up the courage to sing Sinead O’Conner’s ‘Nothing Compares’ when my friends went out for a cigarette. It must have sounded ok – the Best Mate came running back in to see who was on the microphone and was surprised to see it was me.
Since then, karaoke has become a joint passion that only we seem to share – our collective friends would rather pull out their own fingernails than pick up a microphone. It just so happens that the Best Mate now runs his own karaoke nights at the pub that he works at, and so I invited myself along.
For the first time in ages I took the time to actually get dressed up. It wasn’t anything fancy, but I did my hair and make up and put on some nicer clothes than I would normally wear, and was feeling good by the time I left the house. The pub was fairly quiet, but by 9.00pm I had drank a few fruit ciders and decided to go for it, starting with Mark Ronson and Amy Winehouse’s version of ‘Valerie,’ followed, by John Legend’s ‘All Of Me.’ The response was awesome, although it did prompt an elderly drunk man to attempt to talk to me about classical music by screaming ‘BACH! BACH!’ in my face and spitting all over me as he was doing so.
Nice.
Suffice to say, I got home at 2.30am. For the first time in months I was drunk – not falling about all over the place drunk, but drunk enough to confuse The Bloke with whatever I decided to ramble at him about when I was climbing into bed. I had performed half of Journey’s back catalogue, along with a few Irene Cara classics and at one point a really rude song from a Tenacious D album (I’m not going to repeat it on here – your eyes will bleed).
Unfortunately, what I have discovered since reaching my 30’s is that a brilliant night is now followed my an enormous hangover, and so the highs of Friday night were marred slightly by waking up on Saturday morning with an intense headache, jelly legs and an urge never to drink ever again.
Definitely worth it though…
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog
My Grandfather was a stereotypical northern English man to the core, and the kindest, sweetest person that I ever had the privilege to know. For those that are familiar with the comedy duo Morecambe and Wise, my grandfather was very similar to Eric Morecambe – he had a silly sense of fun and an eclectic sense of humour, and some of my happiest memories are of him proclaiming that the sponge pudding and custard would put the ‘skin on yer back like velvet.’ He loved music and liked to make up silly lyrics, and even though he passed away in 1997 I still remember every word to his version of ‘My Grandfather’s Clock,’ written in 1876 by Henry Clay Work. I’ve written it in the way that I remember him singing it to my sisters and I – he had a broad northern accent – so would say words like ‘me’ instead of ‘my’… While I am not expecting others to understand or even enjoy, this means a lot to me.
So, for a bit of a laugh, find the song on YouTube and I challenge you to follow the lyrics within the song!
Me Grandfather’s Clock – Alfred Elliott
Now me Grandfather’s clock,
Was a Waterbury watch,
It could live forty days without food.
With a small ‘at on its head,
And me father’s mackintosh,
It was dressed up like a Piccadilly dude.
Though it stood in the ‘all,
‘Cos the cupboard was so small,
And we ‘ad no place the food for to store.
So the butter and the eggs
And the little mutton legs,
We out them in me Grandfather’s clock
Now me Grandfather’s clock
Was me mother’s primulator,
And through the park in it we used to ride.
There was me and Polly Perkins, Liza Jane and Treacle Tommy,
Screaming Jimmy and the twins all stuck inside.
Now me Granddad, who was dead,
Changed his mind, got up instead,
And the sight that met his eyes gave him a shock.
For the man with the coal,
Couldn’t get it down the ‘ole,
So we put it in me Grandfather’s clock.
What about you guys? Are there any songs that mean a lot to you from your childhood?
I’ve been blogging for just over a year now, and in that time I’ve managed to produce hundreds of posts. I spent some of yesterday revisiting these, editing and deleting them, and I thought that it might be a nice idea to compile some of my favourites to share with you again, in case you may have missed them. Simply click the image for the link:
23 Things You Should Actually Do before You’re 23
Successes and Mistakes: Blogging in 2013
Why Carrie Bradshaw Needs a Slap
46 Reasons Why Women Are Amazing
Karma’s a Bitch, Right?
Fifty Rules for Life
25 Thoughts For The Day
No Means No!
How To Gain 60lbs in Five Years
Great Expectations
Sorry, I’m Not Sorry
Stop Apologising For Yourself!
Nine Things We Don’t Owe Anybody
Eight Reasons Why I Blog
Professional Or Hobbyist? (Freshly Pressed)
How To Know When You’re a Teacher
Feel free to share, tweet, pin and repost any of these! As always, I’d love to know your thoughts! What are your favourites?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @Suzie81blog
During my many travels around the Internet I always stumble across things that make me laugh, cry and think. I decided to focus on the ‘think’ aspect today, and I have compiled some of my favourites to share with you.
1. A fine is a tax for doing something wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
2. School teaches lessons and then gives us a test. Life gives us a test and then we learn the lessons from it.
3. Life was much simpler when Apple, Blackberry and Raspberry were just fruit.
4. There is always an element of truth behind ‘just kidding.’
5. There is always knowledge behind ‘I don’t know.’
6. There is always emotion behind ‘I don’t care.’
7. There is always pain behind ‘It’s okay.’
8. You can’t buy love, but there are times where you may pay heavily for it.
9. Money can’t buy happiness, but it is far more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
10. Alcohol does not solve problems, but neither does milk.
11. We buy things that we don’t need, with money that we don’t have, to impress people we don’t like.
12. If you tell the truth, you never have to remember a lie.
13. If there are no ups and down in life, it means you’re dead.
14. The people with the best advice to give are usually the ones with the most problems.
15. Teenagers have the time and energy but not the money. Adults have the money and energy but not the time. Pensioners have the money and time but not the energy.
16. You can’t say M without your lips touching.
17. You’re now trying to say M without your lips touching.
18. The things that you don’t learn are the most likely things to be in the exam.
19. If undecided about two options, flip a coin. Your instinct will tell you which one you’re secretly hoping for when you feel happy or disappointed with the result.
20. The hardest thing and the right thing are often the same thing.
21. Closed minds are not often accompanied by closed mouths.
22. Fake plants will die if you don’t pretend to water them.
23. You are more likely to wake up at 6.00am on your days off.
24. The little toe is the perfect device for finding the edges of furniture in a darkened room.
25. This will cause a discussion as to whether it is ‘ironic’ or not. It isn’t.
What about you? Anything you would like to add?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog
It’s Father’s Day, and I’m expecting my social networking feeds to be filled with messages of love for fathers and father figures. While my own father is still alive, I haven’t seen or spoken to him in twelve years and I have absolutely no intention of having any contact in the future. This was a decision that I made at the age of nineteen and I have never regretted it. However, instead of writing a post about this, I started thinking about all the people in my life who are there and who offer continuous love and support in everything that I do – people who I often take for granted. Here are the things that we should take the time to say to somebody we care about today.
1. Thank you. It’s amazing how often that these little words are forgotten. Take the time to thank somebody who has gone that extra mile to support you.
2. The fact that you like having them in your life and that you enjoy spending time with them. It’s taken for granted that we spend time with the people (usually) who we enjoy being around and who makes us happy, but have you actually ever said this to them?
3. What you appreciate about them. My mother, The Bloke and my friends are funny, intelligent and talented people. They listen to me. When I’ve had a bad day, my friend V meets me in the pub, buys me a drink and let’s me rant. My best friend rings me several times a week so we can catch up, and we’ll meet at least once a week. M invites me round to her house for dinner. When I was in the hospital, C and M visited me. When my cat Wobbly died, G brought round cupcakes to my house. They buy me flowers, send me messages of support, make me laugh, entertain me and invite me out to places so we can spend time together.
4. That you find them attractive. This is something that would probably be best saying to your partner – I think my mother and friends would be slightly freaked out if I said this to them. However, a compliment on how they look and what they’re wearing would make somebody’s day.
5. My best memories involve you. The ‘do you remember when…?’ conversations are always good for strengthening a relationship. Reminiscing about hilarious past experiences never fails to remind us of why we have the friendship in the first place.
6. That you support them. They may already know this, but it wouldn’t hurt to let them know that you’re there.
7. That you love them. There are different kinds of love that are reserved for different people, but take the time to let them know (where possible – verbalising love for somebody may be taken in the wrong context in some situations).
What about you guys? What do you think is important to say to somebody that you care about?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog
Every so often I’ll read an amazing post that I thoroughly enjoy from start to finish, and it will trigger an idea. However, in this case I’m blatantly stealing.
This post, from Jolene over at ‘Valley Girl Gone Country’ was her response to a blog that she’d read about being single, and the types of men that she had dated.
It instantly brought back the horrors of some of my ex – boyfriends and dating experiences, and so I thought I’d create a list of things that have genuinely happened to me from the ‘frogs’ I have kissed. The above is a video of a South African Desert Frog, and when I saw it I couldn’t have found a more perfect example of some of these human frogs that I’ve had to deal with (It’s also hilarious and I almost bust an eyeball when I first saw it).
This may help you recognise potential frogs in advance in your own lives so you can AVOID THEM COMPLETELY.
Note: This is not an opportunity to complain or belittle the male race – the majority of my relationships have been with nice, genuine and hard-working men who treated me well. However, I have also had my fair share of experiences with men who have acted a little strangely…
1. I was dumped by a guy without warning. He let me know that he no longer wanted to be in a relationship with me by putting the phone down on me when I rang his house. No explanation. It transpired later (when his friend told me) that he was annoyed that I’d told a mutual friend that he was upset that his dog had died. I still don’t know how to respond to that.
2. I went on a weekend away with a boyfriend. We had a lovely day – we explored the area, had a laugh, ate a gorgeous meal and I was relaxed and happy when we returned to the hotel. I was, however, shattered, and wanted to go to sleep. When I told him I wasn’t ‘in the mood’, he had a tantrum: a full blown, stamping his feet toddler tantrum. I went to sleep, and we returned home the following day in silence.
3. The same boyfriend invited me on a trip to New York. Turns out, his parents had paid for the trip as a birthday present, and they were coming too. I had no problem with that and was grateful for the opportunity – his family were lovely people. Unfortunately, they were also strict Catholics and had booked two rooms in the hotel – one for me and his mother to sleep in, the other for him and his father. While I liked his family and respected their values, I was 25 years old at the time and felt uncomfortable about it. Suffice to say, I didn’t go, and we broke up not long after.
4. I really liked a guy that I met through a mutual friend. After flirting for a while, we kissed. He stopped, looked me right in the face and said “I’m sorry, I’m gay.” This was the first time he’d told anyone. He was in his 30’s and had worked with my friend for several years, who had no idea. He chose the exact moment he kissed me to ‘come out.’ While I’m always pleased to hear somebody has the courage to do this, I’d have preferred it if he’d mentioned something sooner.
5. I was asked out by an extremely attractive man when I was in college. On our first date he picked me up in his car, and I noticed that he had tapes (I’m showing my age here) of Britney Spears and Les Miserables on his dashboard, which he said were his sister’s. It was eventually revealed that the car actually belonged to his girlfriend.
6. I was excited to go on a second date with a man with whom I’d enjoyed a wonderful first. I bought a new outfit and spent ages getting ready, making sure that everything was perfect to the last minor detail. He took me to a Needle Museum. Yes, I spent two hours wandering round a museum dedicated to the history of sewing needles.
7. A man that I had started dating started texting me one night, asking where I was. I was at home, and told him as such, but he didn’t believe me. He bombarded me with text messages for half an hour, accusing me of seeing somebody else (which I wasn’t), and only stopped when I threatened to call the police. The following morning, at SIX IN THE MORNING, he knocked on my front door, offering a Tupperware box of homemade vegetable soup as an apology. I simply closed the door.
8. An ex and I broke up because he had started to sit outside my workplace in his car all day and started to get quite possessive and clingy. After we separated he turned up at my friend’s house that she shared with her partner in tears. He ended up staying for a cup of tea, he put some shelves up for them and left. MY FRIEND LIVES TWO HUNDRED MILES AWAY FROM HIM. He drove two hundred miles so he could cry on my friend’s shoulder. She, and I never heard from him again, although a mutual friend informed me that he’s got three kids now.
9. And finally, the ultimate: a man that I was in a relationship with, who I was in love with, was conducting a relationship with me while his girlfriend of three years was travelling around Australia. I was unaware of this, and when I found out, I got rid. The girl moved back in with him upon her return.
So, it’s taken quite a few frogs to find my prince. For those of you losing hope, just think of these examples and remember this wonderful quote:
‘It’s better to be alone than be with someone who makes you feel alone…’
Unlike some, I love memes and inspirational quotes and I often use them in my posts. Some make me laugh, some make me think, others genuinely provide me with motivation for the day. The inspirational quotes in particular often appear in the same format – a carefully selected font over the top of a beautiful image.
A while ago I read a post in which Danny Dyer’s twitter entries (English actor with a thick cockney accent) were used as an inspiration for such memes – things like ‘Noone asks Santa what he wants for Christmas. Bless him, the fat bearded pisshead…’ made me laugh, and it made me think about the drunken ramblings from people that I’ve heard over the years. I asked my friends for some of the funniest things they’ve ever heard someone say when drunk, and I edited them as inspirational posters…
What about you guys? What are the funniest things that you’ve ever heard somebody say when drunk?
It’s pay day and even though it’s the holidays I had to go into work to do some extra coursework with the students. On the way back I decided to treat myself and stopped at the local McDonald’s, where I promptly ate my food whilst catching up on Twitter and minding my own business. Suddenly something hit me on the back of the head. I turned around to see a child standing there and laughing – he had thrown some of his food at me and seemed to find it hilarious. His mother responded by simply whining at him “Jadeeeeeeen… Don’t dooooo thaaaaaaaat! You’re soooooo nauuuuuuuuuughty!” in a baby voice. I was tempted to stand up, dump the rest of my fries on his head and laugh back, but then I realised that it would have been a complete waste of food, and I hate that.I normally try and put a positive theme into my blog posts, but sometimes things (usually inconsiderate people) really irritate me.
I’m always reminded of the Family Guy episode where Peter hosts a news segment called ‘What Really Grinds My Gears,’ and so for today’s post I am going to do the same.
These are the things that really Grinds My Gears
1. Eating popcorn with open mouths at the cinema.
2. Kicking the seats at the cinema.
3. Allowing children to run around at the cinema.
4. Spitting on the floor, particularly in the spot where I’m just about to walk.
5. Playing music so loudly from their car that it vibrates my whole body and the walls of my house.
6. Standing in front of me when it’s clear I’m looking at something – this applies to the zoo, museums, art galleries and shops.
7. Hitting me in the ankles with pushchairs.
8. Sneezing on the back of my head when I’m on the bus.
9. Weight comparisons.
10. Playing music on public transport – It’s inevitably awful music and I’ve been tempted to play some 80’s rock music in retaliation.
11. Lectures on any form of religion.
12. Making a ‘duck face’ when taking photographs.
13. A complete lack of manners.
14. Only contacting me when somebody wants something.
15. Walking past me and telling me to ‘cheer up’ when I’m minding my own business.
16. Lecturing me on my job.
17. Interrupting me.
18. Racists.
19. Sexists.
20. Animal and child abusers.
21. Homophobes.
22. People telling me how much money they earn.
23. People who feel the world owes them something.
24. Stopping suddenly right in front of me and then tutting at me when I bump into them.
25. Responding to an argument with ‘whatever.’
26. Talking down to someone in a service based job – waitress, barman, fast food restaurant, coffee house…
27. Making assumptions on my personality based on my accent. ( I have a thick northern English accent and some assume that I lack intelligence because of it.)
28. Assuming that accidental eye contact actually means ‘I want to sleep with you.’
29. Hypocrites.
30. People who don’t take no for an answer.
31. Nagging.
32. Borrowing something and not returning it.
33. Dropping litter on the floor.
34. Not picking up dog mess from the street.
And finally…
35. Allowing a child to throw food and me without correcting it, disciplining it and offering an apology.What about you guys? What really grinds your gears?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog
Over the last 25 days the ever creative and thoroughly fabulous Twindaddy has created and hosted a song challenge in which he has inspired other bloggers to think about songs that mean different things to them.
I didn’t participate in the whole event as I couldn’t commit to 25 straight days of blogging, but I have followed the posts that he and his participants have created and they have reminded me of some amazing songs that I had long forgotten about and brought back some happy memories. I wanted to put my two cents (or in my case, pennies) in there and acknowledge the songs that are special to me.
1. Don’t Stop Believing: Journey
This song has followed me everywhere throughout my life – it seems to surface at times when I am in a happy place with people that I care about. I would like to add here that the GLEE version does not count!!!
(Video uploaded by gsbajak4)
2. I Won’t Send Roses (from Mack and Mabel): Jerry Herman
This was my grandfather’s favourite song, and my favourite version of it is sung by Robert Preston. It’s a beautiful piece of music and I remember spending many hours at the weekends listening to it (on vinyl) at his flat. It makes me feel at peace and gives me a beautiful reminder of a wonderful man.
(Video uploaded by bernieb48)
3. When Love and Hate Collide: Def Leppard
This song has helped me through some tough times – the chorus in particular contains some harmonies that I refer to as ‘gut chords’ – they’re so pwerful it is possible to feel them in the gut. I have loved it from the first time that I heard it and it is one of my ‘go to’ songs that I listen to when I am in need of comfort.
(Video uploaded by Def Leppard)
4. Adagio For Strings: Samuel Barber
This was the first classical piece of music that I truly fell in love with and one of my greatest memories is playing this on stage with a large string orchestra. Fabulous.
Lying on a balcony in the hot sunshine in Malia, staring at a blue sky while this song played on the CD player in the background is potentially one of the most truly wonderful moments of my life so far. A stunning voice from a woman whose talents were taken away from us far too soon.
(Video uploaded by JohnWhite67)
6. Bring It On Home To Me: Sam Cooke
I adore this song. This is a song I will listen to in the bath to help me relax. Fabulous.
(Video uploaded by strictlyOldies)
7. Always: Bon Jovi
Bon Jovi are my favourite band. I’ve seen them five times in concert all over the UK and love most of their songs. However, this song has always spoken to me and it is also on my ‘bath’ list, as well as being a song I regularly do at karaoke.
(Video uploaded by BonJoviVEVO)
8. Seasons of Love (from RENT): Jonathan Larson
This was a song that my college choir sang. We all love this song, the harmonies are great and it has stuck with all of us over the years – my friend even had a choir sing it at her wedding. Some of my happiest times.
(Video uploaded by BroadwayWorldSongs)
9. I Can’t Help Myself: The Four Tops
This was a song that I grew up with – my mother is a huge motown and soul fan and so a large amount of my ‘pick me up’ playlist consists of songs like this from the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s. I love this song in particular and it reminds me of my mother teaching me how to dance to this in our living room as a child.
(Video uploaded by bol2funk)
10. The Blower’s Daughter: Damien Rice
A stunning, beautiful song. The reason why I have included this particular song is because I feel this passion and intensity that the song evokes.
(Video uploaded by Damien Rice)
I could go on and on – I’ve stopped at ten so you wouldn’t fall asleep, but these are songs that best represent me, my personality and my life.
Congratulations Twindaddy on a fantastic challenge, and thank you for keeping me entertained!
What songs best represent you guys?
You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog
Suzie Speaks 
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