14 Silly Ways To Get Over a Bad Day

Posted on April 25, 2014 by suzie81speaks

Having a bad day? It happens to everyone, but it’s important to remember that it won’t last forever. However, as I’ve had a run of bad days recently – it’s been a very emotional time – I decided to be silly and provide you with a list of 14 ways to cheer yourself up…

1. Imagine doing this to the person who has upset you. If she can do it, we all can. (senorgif.com)

2. Have a good cry (gifs8.com)

3. Take a leisurely walk to calm your nerves (icanhasgifs.com)

4. Help yourself to something nice to eat. (ohmagif.com)

5. Work out. (Gifsoup.com)

6. Have a nice long bath (senorgif)

7. Smile! Think about all the things you should be grateful for! (muver54.tumblr.com)

8. Look! This chocolate bar actually exists... (Mirror.co.uk)

9. As does this mojito… (facebook)

10. And remember, your day isn’t as bad as this person’s: (gifbin.com)

11. Or this persons… (icanhasgif.com)

12. And if all else fails, there is always Star Trek Meets Monty Python: Knights of the Round Table…

Uploaded by Starship Conductor

13. And Bad Lip Syncing to Game of Thrones

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDxJ2T21PsE

Uploaded by Lip Readings

14. And finally, if this doesn’t make you smile, nothing will…

Uploaded and created by Benjamin J. Ames

What about you? What do you do to cheer yourself up after a bad day?

You can also find me on Twitter and tumblr @suzie81blog

Don’t forget to ‘like’ my Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/Suzie81Speaks

Twelve Childhood Things That I Miss

Posted on March 12, 2014 by suzie81speaks

After reading an interview with British comedian Sarah Millican (she’s fabulous, check her out @SarahMillican75) in which she discussed things from childhood that she missed being able to do, I thought that I would compile a list of my own.

1. During hot summer days, putting on a swimming costume and sitting in a paddling pool in the back garden. My neighbours would think that I’m a little strange if I did this now…

2. Making my own radio broadcasts. I had an old tape recorder that had a microphone and I would record myself interviewing famous people. I would then tape the Top 40 songs from the Singles Chart, stopping it before the DJ started to speak over it.

3. Being able to innocently read this (one of my favourite childhood books) without sniggering to myself.

4. Watching episodes of Saved By The Bell during the holidays, and arguing with my sisters as to who Zack would ask out first.

5. Fastening my coat around my neck to resemble a cape and running around the playground.

6. Being able to do a cartwheel and a somersault. If I were to attempt these now I would need to be placed in traction afterwards.

7. Being able to watch He-Man without questioning his sexuality (not that it matters, I’m just distracted now by Adam’s pink tights).

8. Playing sports for an entire day without the fear that every muscle in my body will shrivel up and die the next day in protest.

9. My mother’s Sunday roast dinners. Mine are pretty awesome, but they still don’t compare.

10. Eating the greatest chocolate bar of all time: Cadbury’s Secret. Chocolate marshmallow wrapped in strands of chocolate. I miss them.

11. Playing Sonic the Hedgehog on the Sega Mega Drive. It’s the only computer game I’ve ever completed.

12. Getting photographs back from the processing store after excitedly waiting for several hours and being delighted with the results, even though my fingers were in most of the pictures.

What about you guys? Is there anything that you miss doing from your childhood?

You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog

How to Put the ‘Pro’ in Procrastinate

Posted on March 10, 2014 by suzie81speaks

Do you have a major deadline looming at work? Are you behind on your assignments? Don’t know where to start? Here is how to procrastinate like a pro…

1. Make a list. Not just an average list – create the most detailed list you’ve ever written, complete with time frames and tick boxes. Assure yourself that this list will help you break your tasks down into easy chunks and make you feel less overwhelmed by the sheer amount of work ahead of you.

2. Tidy the room that you are working in. If you are at home, put a load of laundry into the machine – it’s impossible to work in an untidy environment, and you’ve been meaning to do this for ages. This will then lead to…

3. Moving objects and items of furniture around. You know the mirror would look far better on the other wall, and moving the chair would give you more space.

4. Find various amounts of change lying around the house. Count the change and put them into money bags, ready to be taken to the bank later in the day.

5. All the cleaning and organising is starting to make you hungry, so make yourself some lunch. However, you don’t have what you would really like in your cupboards, so this is a good opportunity to go to the shop and buy a few things. After all, you can’t work on an empty stomach! While there, make sure to spend at least half an hour looking for extra bargains to prevent making two trips and pick up a new toy for the cat – she’s old and cute and deserves it. Call in at the bank on the way back home and deposit the change that you collected earlier.

6. While you are eating lunch, check all your social networking sites, your blog and your email. Ensure that you spend time reading as many posts as possible and commenting. One of the posts that you read is almost certainly going to give you an idea for a post of your own, so use this as an opportunity to do a bit of research and write down some ideas on your new subject.

7. Write the entire post.

8. Go back and edit the post when you realise that you have made ridiculous spelling mistakes throughout.

9. Turn the television on for some ‘background noise.’ Discover that one of the channels has started to show Jerry Springer episodes. You haven’t seen Jerry Springer in years, so you watch this episode, and the other two that follow, just to see whether the programme has changed or not.

10. You realise that your laundry has finished, so make sure that you take it out, put it in the dryer or spend ages hanging it out on the clothes airer. This is also a really good opportunity to match your socks up.

11. The cat is in need of some attention, so make sure that you spend the next half an hour encouraging her to play with ‘Mr Mouse,’ the new toy that you bought for her at the shop. During play time you are once again struck by just how cute she is, and therefore you have to take pictures of her. Of course, these will need editing afterwards either on Instagram or Lightroom and posting on your social networking sites.

12. After posting these, read an interesting article that a friend has shared about ‘The World’s Most Interesting People’ on Buzzfeed. This will undoubtedly lead to the discovery of other interesting articles, followed by various Wikipedia searches to find out the current situations of the people that you have just read about and almost certainly a video of Jimmy Fallon doing something amusing.

13. Look at the time, discover that it is 3.00pm and convince yourself that NOW you need to get your work done. Take out your laptop. While it is loading, use your phone to check your blog and see if you have received any comments from the post you shared earlier in the day. Discover that your friend has sent you a rather amusing cat meme, and decide that the only acceptable response is to send one back. This exchange lasts several minutes, followed by one inviting the other round to their house. Turn laptop off and meet friend.

14. Return home in time to cook dinner and feed the cat. Realise that you have recorded an episode of ‘The Good Wife’ from the night before, and watch it whilst eating dinner. Make sure you spend time afterwards doing the washing up.

15. Your feet are feeling a little sore, so get in a long, hot bubble bath, during which you top it up several hours later when the water has gone cold. Realise that your toenails need some maintenance, and upon looking in the mirror realise that your eyebrows are beginning to take over your face, so spend the next hour rectifying this.

16. The hot water has made you sleepy, so decide to have a quick ‘power nap’ before you start your work.

Wake up at 5.30am the next day.

What about you? Are you a procrastinator?

You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog

Alternative Oscar Highlights

Posted on March 3, 2014 by suzie81speaks

I didn’t watch the Oscars last night – it was shown on Sky, which I don’t have, and so I followed it through Twitter and online videos and updates.

The were several highlights that I could discuss – Jennifer Lawrence’s ability to stay upright, Sandra Bullock’s stunning dress, Jarod Leto’s moving speech, the fabulous vocal performances from Pink and Idina Menzel and, of course, Ellen DeGeneres’s hilarious hosting skills. However, these were some of the things that made me smile throughout the night.

Benedict Cumberbatch photobombs U2 on the red carpet

Brad Pitt scarfs pizza that was ordered by Ellen DeGeneres during the ceremony (and I’m slightly concerned about the boob that looks like it is about to pop out in the background)

A national newspaper decides to rename the most famous song from ‘The Wizard of Oz’ – I’m sure ‘Somewhere Over The Window’ will be just as popular as the original…

And finally, courtesy of Ellen DeGeneres… The greatest selfie ever!

What about you guys? What was your favourite Oscar moment? You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @suzie81blog

Tell Me a Joke

Posted on February 16, 2014 by suzie81speaks

I’m back home, but feeling extremely low today. The cat needed emergency vet treatment last night, costing me more money than I have, I still feel dizzy and sick and generally weak still, and after having just a few hours sleep I was feeling at the point of despair this morning. Luckily, The Bloke stepped in and took over, allowing me to go to bed for the afternoon while he sorted the cat out.

I don’t have the motivation to write much, but I wanted to take the opportunity to say a huge thank you for being so amazing over the last few days. I received that many messages I couldn’t keep up, so I’ll attempt to respond to them over the next few weeks.

However, my miserable mood has given me an idea. I want you to tell me a joke. Obviously, I don’t want anything that can be deemed as racist and/or offensive – the more random and silly the joke is, the better. I thought it would be a fun way to see what you could come up with!

Looking forward to catching up with you all soon!

Motivation Needed

Posted on January 12, 2014 by suzie81speaks

I saw this quote from Karen Lamb and it really resonated with me this morning.

Currently, it is 1.00pm. I got out of bed at 8.30am, went to the shop to buy bacon, cooked The Bloke some bacon sandwiches, took them to him so he could have breakfast in bed, and ever since then I have been sat in bed, blogging. I started to write a post about one thing, I got bored and saved it for later, and then repeated the process with something else.

This would be fine, except for the fact that I have a monumental amount of marking and planning to do for next week and three major things in particular need to be finished off and emailed to my line manager by the end of today. I have several loads of washing to do, I have to put away my clean clothes and the upstairs part of the house needs vacuuming.

This is a nasty habit that I have developed over the last few years – my life has become procrastination central. The main issue isn’t that the marking and planning doesn’t interest me – once I’ve begun and ‘in the zone’ so to speak, I find that I can get quite absorbed with what I’m doing and feel a sense of satisfaction when it is completed – it’s getting the motivation to start doing it in the first place. This morning I had a thought:

If I had started this work yesterday I would have been finished by now…

If I do nothing else this year, this is the thing that I would like to change the most over 2014. So much so, in fact, that I am going to now put down my laptop, pick up my school laptop, do the work and then reward myself tomorrow with an uninterrupted blog fest in a tidy house, guilt free.

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/01/27/daily-prompt-barriers/

What about you guys? Does procrastination work for you?

Don’t forget to check out the winners of my Week 4 New Year Competition – their buttons are in my sidebar.

You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @Suzie81blog

I wrote this earlier, but it applies to the current Daily Prompt so I thought that I would link it in…

Queen of the Imposters

Posted on January 11, 2014 by suzie81speaks

palpak.org

Yesterday, as I was just about to leave work, my boss asked me to have a look through some of the learning objectives he had planned for one of the lessons that he is going to deliver next week. I read through what he had written, and offered some suggestions.

He wrote my suggestions down.

This isn’t the first time this has happened since I started teaching at my current school nearly two years ago. To most people, it wouldn’t mean anything. However, I was (yet again) taken aback by the fact that he actually valued my opinion. He’s an experienced and excellent practitioner and I have an enormous amount of respect for him, so why would he want to know what I think?

This is something that has plagued my working life since I graduated in 2006. I’ve been incredibly fortunate in that I’ve been in full-time employment ever since, while some of my friends have experienced various struggles when obtaining jobs over the years. I’ve always felt that this was predominantly down to luck and being in the right place at the right time.

images.com/corbis

Job 1: Two weeks after I had received my degree results, I saw an advert for a Learning Mentor at a school on the other side of the city. I didn’t fully know what a Learning Mentor was, but after doing some research I thought that it sounded interesting and I decided to apply for it anyway. I got the job. (It turned out to be the best job I’ve ever had).

Job 2: The funding was being cut for the Learning Mentoring posts, and I was worried that I was going to be made redundant. A random conversation with a Deputy Headteacher, in which he learned that I had an honours degree in music, led to him suggesting that I apply for a Graduate Teacher Programme (GTP) course, which the school would support. I applied at the end of May and by the beginning of June I had been accepted. GTP courses are now notoriously difficult to get onto and the competition to be allowed onto them are enormous, with application being submitted months in advance.

Job 3: As my GTP was nearly finished, the school informed me that they couldn’t offer me a teaching position after I had qualified and so I needed to find another job. I saw an advert for a school that was situated not far from where I lived and applied. I heard nothing back from them, so assumed that I hadn’t been granted an interview. Unfortunately, at the same time, my mother (who lives 100 miles away) was taken into hospital and so I rushed to catch a train. Two days later, my mother was recovering and we knew that she was going to be fine. At 6.00am I checked my phone answer machine messages to discover that I had an interview for 9.00am that day at the school I had applied for. My sister raced over to look after my mum, I jumped on a train, informed the school of the situation and that I was on my way. I turned up nearly two hours late, with no lesson plan and no resources (aside from a few CD’s that I happened to have in my bag). I got the job.

Family Guy

After this I had a few interviews at two different schools that I didn’t get and at the time I was crushed. However, I managed to get a job at my current school, which I love, and have since found out that the places that I applied for and was turned down are places that I would have really struggled in – the education system is a small world – everybody seems to be related to each other – and I have heard horror stories and thanked my lucky stars that they turned me down as I know that I would have gone from the proverbial frying pan into the fire…

There’s that word again… Luck.

My problem is that I feel like an imposter. I have been given lots of praise and encouragement at work – my last few sets of lesson observations have been awarded with ‘Outsanding,’ trainee teachers are sent to my room to observe my teaching, I have trained other members of staff that have been in the profession twice as long as I have and I have been grateful for every opportunity that has been offered. However, I can’t shake the feeling that at some point I am going to be found out for the fraud that I feel that I am. My faculty is filled with hard-working, lovely, high achieving adults who seem to spend their entire lives marking and planning and be able to do everything better than I do. I hate having to attend meetings as I feel that my opinion is going to be viewed as irrelevent and so I often feel that it is best to keep quiet unless I am absolutely sure that what I am going to say makes sense. When something good happens, instead of feeling proud of myself I often find myself thinking that I’ve managed to fool them this time and have got away with it. What I find most ridiculous about it is that I haven’t experienced any negativity from my colleagues, I have enough evidence to prove that I shouldn’t feel like this and yet the thoughts still won’t leave.

I’ve often been told that I have a tendency to overthink things. I must admit, I feel silly writing about it, and haven’t done so to prompt further praise or fish for compliments, but it has been troubling me for a while. Is it luck? Fate? I’m not sure what initially caused these thoughts – it could be a lack of confidence or bad experiences that I have had in the past, but it is beginning to affect the way I think about myself and my job.

Does anybody else feel like this?

You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @Suzie81blog

Sisterhood of the Massive Knickers

Posted on January 10, 2014 by suzie81speaks

I’ve had a rather crappy week.

Gorgeous

It’s Friday evening, I’ve just indulged in a large portion fish & chips (I’m English – no stereotypes there obviously), I’m watching ‘Footloose’ and I’m wearing an sweater that is too big for me and a pair of pyjama bottoms. My hair is tied back, I’ve got very little make-up on and I’m sporting a very fetching pair of socks, which for once actually match. I’m not unhygienic – what I’m wearing is clean and I had a bath this morning before work, but a quick glance in the mirror reveals that I am certainly not going to win ‘Miss World’ anytime soon. At this moment in time, I think I’d have trouble running for ‘Miss Waynetta Slob’ (and for those of you who have no idea who this character was from the 90’s, check out ‘Harry Enfield and Chums’ on YouTube). I have been joined on the couch by two sleepy cats and The Bloke.

Gorgeous.

In the years that I’ve been with The Bloke I’ve put on weight. Not enough to make me feel grotesque, but enough to change my body shape. My cute little thongs have morphed over time into ENORMOUS knickers, and I spend most of my evenings and weekends in baggy clothing that is designed for comfort. At best, I dress like a teenage boy. I’m not at the stage where I consider that I have ‘let myself go’, but I certainly make far less effort to look good than I used to when I’m at home.

But is there anything wrong with this? Should the female population permanently feel the need to be glamorous at all times?

An article from ‘Oprah’s website in 2005 offers some interesting insight into why women let themselves go. A prominent message was that women put their families needs ahead of their own, wearing their exhaustion almost as a ‘badge of honour’. Mothers in particular have little time to themselves and find it almost impossible to muster any enthusiasm for beauty regimes or losing weight that they may have retained after giving birth.

So what excuse do I have? I don’t have children, I’m not married and aside from three cats and The Bloke I don’t have any family responsibilities. My excuse is simple: I just can’t be bothered.

I saw this quote from the ever immaculate Dita Von Teese:

‘I advocate glamour. Every day. Every minute.’

Dita Von Teese

While I admire Miss Von Teese’s message, I’ve found that life often gets in the way. I’m not lazy -my job is stressful, I work long hours both in and out of school, I deal with hundreds of grumpy teenagers all week and when I’ve finished all I want to do is have a hot bath, get my feet rubbed and go to sleep. The last thing I need (or want) to be thinking about is how attractive I look. Similarly, I certainly don’t expect The Bloke to be perfectly groomed all the time… A quick glance over at him reveals that he’s wearing an old white T-Shirt, a fleece and a pair of trousers that were made at the dawn of time, but I still find him extremely handsome.

If I’m going out for an evening, regardless of who it’s with, I’ll put on a beautiful dress and enjoy taking the time to do my extensive beauty regime in the process. However, on a day-to-day basis I’m more than happy to lay like broccoli and veg in front of the TV in my massive knickers and pyjamas.

The Bloke’s a lucky man.

What about you? Do you make the effort to look good all the time? Do you like your partner to make the most of themselves when just relaxing at home?

You can also find me on Twitter and Tumblr @Suzie81blog

Don’t forget to check out the blogs that I am advertising on the sidebar of my blog this week!
Image 2: Dita Von Teese

Obscure Search Terms for 2013

Posted on December 31, 2013 by suzie81speaks

As it is the final day of the year I decided to review my search engine terms since the birth of my blog in April. I have posted some of these during the year, but there have been a number of wonderful additions to add to the list since then. Some have made me smile, some have made me think. Some, in fact, have left me utterly confused.

There are certainly some strange and unusual people out there…

To date, my most popular search has been ‘Things to Be Thankful For,’ which I think is quite sweet, although it does leave me wondering how miserable these people must be if they have to use Google for ideas. This is closely followed by Leah Remini, who I mentioned in a post about Saved By The Bell. There have been a much wider variation of the search for Leah of late, possibly inspired by her controversial fall-out with the Scientology movement:

Leah Remini
Leah Remini saved by the bell
saved by the bell Leah remini
Leah remini in saved by the bell
was leah remini on saved by the bell

and finally…

Leah Remini’s tits.

There’s always one. Well, actually, there’s more than one. I created a post about a hidden picture of a topless woman in Disney’s ‘The Rescuers,‘ and mentioned in another that a scorned woman had posted a picture of her boyfriend’s secret lover’s dirty panties on Facebook when she discovered their affair. Consequently, these have created some extremely interesting search terms for me…

Blog Boobs
Girls dirty panties
Soiled dirty panties
Dirty panties
Sexy dirty painties

While I think that I can link most of the search terms used to a specific post, there were a few that I found to be random and quite confusing…

2
afat log
laughing viking
try whistle girlfriend skinny
write one liners related to life. 4 example : . . life is an ice-cream, enjoy it before it melts! . @ / .. . life is ______________
bomb bein made to kill half of america
Cars crashed in weird places (I think that this may link to the post that I did about Celebrity death jokes)
A smear of ice-cream (why does ice-cream keep appearing???)
how nuch are crap
How much crap

The best one of these has got to be this:

how many drops of eyedrops does it take to make someone poop (I fear for this person)

Then there are searches that I find quite insulting that my blog has come up.

I want to post crap on a blog. (Nice. Thanks for that.)
meh blog
masculinity blog (Strange, considering I’m a woman)
A blog about an annoying teacher

Of the 3,000 search terms that I have received this year, there were two absolutely outstanding search terms and I couldn’t decide who should be awarded the gold medal. They made me laugh, confused me and made me question what on earth I have written on my blog that would lead these terms to me. Consequently, I have decided to award both of them the joint first prize for entertainment value…

a situation that needs to get unfucked

Testicle moisturiser

I have no words (and decided that it was probably best that I didn’t put a picture to go with this one…)

What about you? What is the most unusual search term you have had this year?

You can also find me on Twitter @Suzie81blog

Image credit 1: thinkingblog.com
Image credit 2: danielalexandra.com
Image credit 3: rottenecards.com

Procrastination Central Courtesy of YouTube.

Posted on December 10, 2013 by suzie81speaks

I read a post recently by one of my favourite bloggers, Kaela, who included a fabulous video of Jimmy Fallon and The Roots performing ‘All I Want For Christmas’ on classroom instruments with Mariah Carey. Consequently, when I settled down to start doing some marking I was reminded of this and as a result have been on YouTube for nearly two hours.

The problem with YouTube is the variety of sheer fabulousness that exists in the big wide world – one brilliant video links to another, what starts as a quick ‘sneaky peak’ turns into a marathon viewing session and by the time you realise what you’re doing you’ve watched hundreds of moments of silliness, heartbreak, hilarity and genius. It’s an emotional rollercoaster.

As I’ve already wasted such a monumental amount of time I decided to make the process worthwhile by creating a ‘boredom playlist.’ You don’t have to watch all of these, but if you’re ever feeling despondant and irritable, here is a collection of some ridiculous musical based videos that I’m sure will keep you entertained. Unless you’re mature. Or sensible. Or relatively normal. Or you’ve seen them twenty times already.

Jimmy Fallon and The Roots featuring Robin Thicke: Blurred Lines on classroom instruments. (Late Night With Jimmy Fallon)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOZjaqHioro

Misheard Song Lyrics (PleatedJeans)